Finally finished my presentation, it should be very good, in all immodesty. I think this goes without saying, but I don't think you should plan on me posting any time between tomorrow and the following Tuesday. I'll be not so much near a computer.

First fantasy baseball draft of the year tonight, it's early which is risky due to pre-seasons injuries but whatever.

Going to a UL meeting tonight, this is a great group that will do a lot of good for people's perception of politics, let's get young people involved folks.

Grammy's last night were stellar, from, Simon and Garfunkel to the Tribute to the Clash to Norah Jones running away with the he night, just great. Not only was it a tribute to artists who have actual talent, something the grammys have been sorely lacking as of late,but more over it's the start of a real return to prominence for jazz the he mainstream. Storey seems to be dogging ms. Jones but I disagree, first off there is a reason for many in the music world having a familial connection to someone else in the he music world,. Many belive that musical talent is something that is inherited, passed down. Besides that I happen to enjoy her light style, and passionately mellow lyrics. Though I'll admit I wish the Boss had won a few he deserved it.

Brown was interesting, I got to judge some great rounds and some good talks, of course the highlight of the weekend was Spikes, I learned that there is now a Spikes in Boston I am very excited. I had a Three Dog Night i.e. three doses of pure goodness. Really enjoyed hanging out a lot with both my Brandeis kids, and BU as well. I am a bit worried about the possibility of some very strong opinions and personalities being rather volatile but I think they can be mature enough to not have problems, I hope at least.

Ok, so I love the snow, but I HATE the rain, it's making all my beautiful snow go away, and I am getting soaked

Other than that weekend was fairly uneventful, skating on the flog pond had been in the plans for today, but that was ruined by the rain

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM,

Happy B-day to Storey and Matt, wow two very different people with one common birthday, anyway happy birthday guys.

I am so strange, it's a gorgeous day out, sunny, warm, and I'm pissed about it because the snow is melting and all that is left is water water everywhere, puddles on top of puddles, ick.

Did some volunteer work for Kerry today, calling and such, nice when someone whose got a name you know tells you that you have a great phone manner maybe he'd hire me?
Ran errands at Fleet and T-mobile, while there I figured I had nothing to loose and left my resume with the managers at both places.

Really looking forward to DC, not however looking forward to a prop plane from DC direct to Portland on the way back, and a bit annoyed at the time we get in and time we leave, there won't be any time to enjoy DC really, not being there in the summer will be great.

I actually need to work on the speech/presentation I have to give for the conference, 10-12 minutes with time for questions at the end. I honestly figure if I do well enough with the speech, I may be able to get a job offer or two out of it.

I want to comment on the Bachelorette last night. They run against the West Wing a show I literally schedule my life around BUT last night I chose to watch both of the shows. I am really happy today. I know anyone who participates in those shows has to be a bit strange BUT on both Joe Millionaire and again last night on the Bachelorette two people i.e. Evan and Trista, who don't strike me as the brightest bulbs or deep oceans of complexity, actually chose two people. Zora and Ryan, who do seem to be really good, sincere and loving people, people with compassion and intellect, people who seem to be the opposite not only of their new lovers but also of the person they were chosen over. That really intrigues me, and in a strange way gives me some hope, not that I will find a famous gorgeous blond but rather that maybe, in the end, the good people do win out. I hope so, anyone out there care to prove it to me?

Off to Brown tomorrow, I'll report back either late Saturday or sometime on Sunday.

Sometimes I feel like a nut, sometimes I am a nut

wow I am intensely tired but oh so glad that I stayed up last night. I watched Training Day, what an intense and great movie.

So now the ladies in the apartment seem to have decided to just give me the silent treatment. Now this upsets me not because I care all that much about them, though I'd like to think we could be adult enough to talk about the issue, apparently Nat called Renita on Monday and when she got back she just refused to talk to me again, how mature of her. But the problem I have is that I am so so so bored now. I'm a talker, I live to talk, haven't said a word to anyone in my apartment in nearly 48 hours now, again not of my own choosing. All of this because I was uncomfortable with a guy who, as it turns out, didn't want the apartment.

Other than that it's been a quiet day. I don't expect anything to change. Nothing really planned for tomorrow either,or really for close to a week, save this weekend at Brown. judging should be good, but damn, APDA the musical, and of course, Spikes Junk Yard Dogs, can't wait.

WOW, DAYTIME TV IS PURE TRASH.

Well, the world is on the verge of war, I still have no job, I have no woman to wake up next to, a living situation that is just hellish. I really need one thing, just one thing, to turn right, but I've been saying that for months, years even, and it has yet to change anything, and I don't feel like I can change anything on my own either.

well, even I will admit all this snow, while awesome, and while I fully enjoyed playing in it for a good portion of the day, does make it hard to travel, I ended up having to walk in the street basically which is not so much safe, but you do what must be done, and once again, no whining, it's Boston, it's winter, nuff' said.

Matt and I appear to be at one of our semi-annual breaking points, I was very hurt by an action he took, he fails to understand why it would upset and wants me to simply accept it and not talk about it, what is with everyone in my life not wanting to have adult discussions about issues that come up, and when the hell did I become the mature person in my relationships?

Oh, I nearly forgot you'll all be pleased to know, as I was, that I am apparently something of a legend at BC, not me persay, but my actions it's probably just as well my name is not what's recalled. So I am on the T today, hitting on a couple of gals as I do often, they mentioned they went to BC, I very non-chalantly mentioned that was where I started college, they ask when/why I left. I told them it when and I told them it had something to do with both me wanting to transfer and Father Leahy, and Pat Buchanan wanting me to transfer, this was apparently enough info for them to connect that I was the guy who disrupted the loveably neo-nazi's speech and they were getting quite a kick out of that. Me a legend by my deeds, cool.

so, it's snowing, it's snowing a lot, your point would be what exactly? We live in New England, it's February, yeah so the last few years we have no winter, we finally do and you know what, I LOVE IT. I was out in it earlier after schlepping to the South End for some job stuff, the recruiter seems really gung-ho to help me out, I think he's just happy to have someone who has graduated rom high school, let alone college, on his case load, he also thought it was neat that I have Reich on my reference list, which it is. Anyway, when I got off he T, after having picked up on more phone number thank you very much, I literally was laughing and frolicking, cane and all, in the snow. YAY FOR BLIZZARDS

With respect to yesterdays roommate issue, well, I realized that there is nothing at all compelling me to sign the roommate change form, and I won't not if she offers it to this guy from last night. Am I nuts or is there something wrong with a fifty year old guy with three kids near my age who wants to live with three kids near my age? I mean he refused to say what he did for work, and I just don't want this in my living situation, which is my right, I mentioned this all to to my ever-so friendly English roomie and needless to say I think it's now colder in here than it is outside, not to mention that the other two roomies are not here, one stuck in Ore. due to the snow, the other crashing with friends in central MA.. for the same reason....this could be a fun time just me and the now very pissed of roommate. sidenote if her pent up rage explodes and I am found beaten or dead, you who read this know why :).

Speaking of death, really a shame about that young pitcher on he Orioles, think this will get MLB to ban Ephedrine?

Anyone tired of seeing all this Michael Jackson/Joe Millionaire/Bachelorette crap on TV, jeez it's monday night, you want a soap opera, watch the WWE.

So a few major happenings, today. First and most central to my life, I think my cornea is finally rejecting, jeez took it long enough, but vision has been really off all day and I am getting a nasty halo around all things from which any sort of light emirate, including the computer. I am certainly upset by it, but that won't really do me much good. Ah well, fifteen months is one of the longest of the five I have had I guess I should be happy about that, and that I won't have to be taking those damn pills anymore and heirgo can drown my sorrows in alcohol.

Second thing was a pretty nasty little blow up with my roommate. Nat is leaving soon, has to due to visa stuff, tonight a rather interesting fifty year old recently divorced guy dropped by, seemed nice enough but this is not the sort of person, unless it's my father, that I want to be living with for I think, fairly obvious reasons. This fact didn't bother Nat, her stance is that she needs to get rid of the room and doesn't really care what I or my other two roommates think of the person she chooses. i.e. "I only look out for number one" and is completely un-concerned with our comfort level over who she finds. I am fairly pissed but she is right, there is nothing I can do, I did raise my voice, something not at all like me, and something for which I attempted to immediately apologize, but the girl won't even hear an apology, and actually physically threatened me if I raised my voice again. Whatever, I care about her situation and how she feels I tied to be adult about it and apologize, I also think I do have a right to feel ok with who lives in my home. I dunno, whatever. goodnight.

A thought about last weeks West Wing that has a powerful question for us all.

at the end of the February 5th episode of West Wing the new speech writer asks a very interesting question, one that I think it is essential that everyone asks themselves when considering war.
I am going to change it a little only because they made up a fictional African nation where genocide was going on., basically the quote was this

"Why is the life of an American more important than the life of a non-American" the response was "it just is" but the WHY is the one that we must answer
If we are going to kill people, intentionally or not, we must ask why it is ok to prevent an action that we assume may happen to Americans when we KNOW going to war will kill innocent Iraqis.

This fundamental question, does a circumstance of birth make one life more valuable then others, and should it? a nation clearly has an obligation to protect it's people from death, it's basic social contract stuff, but do they have right to kill people in other nations because they THINK something MIGHT happen I say no honestly, I just don't think that's legitimate yesterday, today tomorrow, or ever.

Death is final, death is a bad thing no matter whose life it is, and I can not support a nation that puts the life of it's people ahead of the lives of others out of fear, not out of actual danger, the moment the first Iraqi civilian dies we loose all of our moral superiority, assuming we ever had it to begin with.

I've been thinking, this forum is certainly a great chance to tell people what's going on in my life, but it's also a great opportunity to tell people how I see things, something I haven't taken nearly enough advantage of, something I will change right now. Not that I actually think it matters since no one reads it but me, but here goes, first a quick update on life

Doc took out three stitches in the he eye today, last one was a real bitch to get out, but it came. no job news really to speak of, though I am getting really excited about this trip to DC in two weeks. For that matter Brown next weekend should be pretty good, though this weekend will blow monkey ass, I am sure Valentines day is a great holiday if you have someone, but man, if you don't it's just another reminder of how alone in the world you truly are. Oh, and Storey, if you are reading this, dude, where is that thing on the he web about moi, should be good for a larf or two nes pas?
Oh, I did find the perfect job for me, it's in Berkeley, doing fundraising for a really great non-profit, but I can't even reach them to find out if they got my resume, I want this, I want this bad, which is why I know I won't get it.


Ok, here goes the tirades on war, terrorism and people on the T

Subject: Iraq, I get it, we are going to go to war, we are going to pre-empt bad shit form happening to us,, because we think Saddam might be naughty and that he MIGHT have weapons, which he MIGHT one day want to use on us, except that we KNOW he can't reach he us with any planes, missiles or otherwise, so the only way he could hurt us would be by getting a bomb into this country, which OH WAIT he can't do because Iraq, belive it or not, doesn't appear to have functioning terrorist guerillas, and Bin Laden himself calls Saddam an infidel, sounds like they are in cahoots to me no? NO!
Why is it ok for us to adopt a national military plan of preventative war, it sets a REALLY dangerous precedent for us, and worldwide for that matter. Beyond that this war is over oil, and hurt feewings of GWB, cause ya know, "that mean bully tried to kill my daddy" Does he realize that in this conquest not only will we loose some of our own soliders but moreover we will inevitably kills innocent Iraqi people, people Bush Himself acknowledges exit because he calls them "prisoners of a tyrant" so ok, they are prisoners, and it makes sense for us to drop bombs on their heads to try to get to the tyrant why?

Subject Terrorism: Duct tape and plastic wrap, this will clearly save you from a nuclear attack WHAT? Look my friend Josh said it best when talking about the WTC, a building he was in when it got hit keep in mind. He told me he is lucky to be alive, but that if it had been his time, he would be dead, it wasn't his time. That's my take on the terror panic that's going on, A. it is highly unlikely that anything will happen, I'm far more likely to die crossing the street, not just cause I am blind either. B. if it does happen and it happens in Boston, then if it's my time, I'll go. I refuse to drive myself bananas trying to prevent something that either, won't happen, or if it does will kill me no matter what I do, life is short, I am reminded of a line from Shawshank Redemption "Get busy livin' or get busy dyin" as depressed as I am, I still choose to live if I do end up at the wrong end of a suitcase bomb, c'est la vie, or in this case c'est la morte

Subject, the T. Listen folks, public transit is just that, public, it's a beautiful thing to have the chance to meet tons of people you'd never talk to, because you all are on a crowded train together. What is so crazy/criminal, about taking that opportunity to get to know a new person or two, I have a strict policy that I talk to at least one person every time I take the T, try to strike up a little conversation, is it just Boston, or do people get wierded out by this other places too? Life is short, I say get to know as many people as you can, you'll probably never see them again, but a nice talk can make someone's day better, it usually does mine, is that really so strange?

BU, Hey U, and Fuck U

Well it's been a bit, sue me. I just feel so disillusioned now.

BU was a good time, I got a heavy amount of quality flirting into the weekend. followed by a rather interesting date Saturday night, she's cool but I won't be seeing her again

The debate aspect of BU was good, saw some very good rounds, though I was fairly pissed that they didn't need me for outrounds, I mean I know I am not Jon's best bud but I guess I think I am a pretty quality judge, and they used other dinos in outrounds, whatever.

I am not a fan of the living situation I am in, roommates are just not my kind of people but the bottom line is that I won't be renewing my lease in august and I would get out now but that's not really doable without a job.

I tried to apply for a job with the city of Boston and was told in order to work for the mayor, or event he library I have to live in Boston, WTF,

Penn station at 5pm AHHHH

So I am back form NYC, lots to report on I suppose.

Took he train down, it was fun, beautiful ride along the coast, got in a a bit late and hand to locate josh with mutual cell phone communications.
He's doing really well, looks good and has a nice place in the he city, a girl he cares a lot about, and in general seems really happy, he's been a friend since before either of us were born, almost literally, and I would really like to be able to hang out with him more often.

The interview turned out to be mostly informational, which displeased me greatly, I had thought I was about a job, but such is life. Then it was off to pen station at 5pm on a Friday, trying to get out to the Island, MY G-D I HATE THAT PLACE. I had to actually consider beating people out of my way with my cane, I consider it a miracle that I found the train and was able to get out to stonybrook. Just a zoo, I can never live in that awful city.

Spent time with my relatives sitting Shiva (it's a Jewish ting, if you don't know, ask). Fran, Kenny and Dan seem to be doing well considering.

Then we dropped my sister off at Hofstra and headed up to Milford, CT sand stayed at an Amerisuites, woke up early Saturday and had a quick breakfast before going up to the room, turning on the he TV and seeing what we all saw on Saturday, just awful, a tragic loss for America for Israel, and for the world. I just can't figure out if they saw the piece fall off on lift off, then why did they not just turn back? I mean Jesus, just fix it and launch again

Went out with Matt, Andrea and Matts bud Eric Saturday night, good times, had never had the chance to spend much time talking to Andrea really, but she is really good people, Eric seems like a good guy despite his warped political leanings, and was nice of him to let the blind guy whoop his ass in Madden 02

Since Saturday night, really done virtually nothing, but that's ok, a few interviews tis week, we'll see what happens. more and more I want to be bay area bound.